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The Invader Zim Dareshow... of MUFFINS!
Story published August 29, 2013 · updated September 27, 2013 · 4 pages · 90 readers · 190 reads
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*Host walks on stage wearing skinny jeans and a Skrillex shirt*
Host (Invader Sonny): Hey, ya'll! You guys ready for the dareshow?!?!
*Crowd goes ballistic*
Invader Sonny: Nice to know. ANYWAYS... from the far reaches of the galaxy, to right here on planet earth, creatures have traveled far and wide to witness... The Invader Zim Dareshow.... OF MUFFINS!!!
Person in crowd: YAY, MUFFINS!!!!
Invader Sonny: Yes. Well. Are there any questions before we get started?
#2 Person in crowd: Can I go to the bathroom?
Invader Sonny: NO. You should have gone earlier. Any OTHER questions?
#2 Person in crowd: BUT I DIDN'T HAVE TO GO THEN!!!!
Invader Sonny: Well, tough noogies.
#3 Person in crowd: Isn't Sonny a boy name?
Invader Sonny: It is a UNISEX name, meaning both genders can have it. For example, Demi Levato's character on SONNY with a Chance. And then there's SONNY Moore, aka Skrillex, who's a boy. Okay, enough questions. Let's meet our contestants. In this corner we have the green, the fierce, the SLIGHTLY annoying, Invader Zim!
*Zim fangirls start screaming and clapping their heads off*
Zim: Yes, yes, I am TRULY amazing. Zim already knows.
Invader Sonny: Okay then. Next we have your favorite big-headed paranormal weirdo, Dib!!
*Crowd is completely silent, exept for a few crickets*
Dib: Aw, COME ON!!!
Invader Sonny: Wow. America really hates Dib. Now, the only girls who make REAL sense around here, Gaz and Tak!
Gaz: Shut up!
Invader Sonny: Wow. Snappy aren't we? Now last, but not least, our favorite robo-retard, Gir!
*Entire crowd goes mosh-pit crazy. Gir is no where to be seen.*
Zim: Gir! Get on stage! *Gir runs in from behind the curtains.
Gir: I was dancin' with a chicken!
Invader Sonny: I'm glad to hear that. Okay, let's lay some ground rules before we get started. No rated M stuff. For the sake (and virginity) of Zim and Dib and the rest of the cast members. None of that yaoi and lemon crap you fangirls do.
Audience member: BUZZKILL! You're no fun, I want my money back!
Invader Sonny: I bought this pepper spray for a reason, pal! An' lemme tell ya, IT STINGS LIKE HOLY HECK! *demonstrates on Dib* See?
Dib: AHHHH!!! IT BURNS!!!!!
Invader Sonny: I will do any pairing except for RaPr, ZaGir, and TaGr, all of which I could never get into but have NOTHING against. You can use your own characters and stuff like that, too, just leave me a comment telling me what they look like. And even though this is called a DAREshow, truths are welcome too. Oh, yeah! Nothing that has to do with Dipper Goes to Taco Bell, either. *Shudders, then shakes her head and smiles* Okay, let's get started!